I will start this post in the same vain as I usually do by apologising for the lack of activity for the past month or so. I have been soooo busy you know. Good job though, because now I have time to write down all that has happened. (Well, not all, just some, obviously. If I had to write down everything that had happened to me in my action-packed life since 17 March then there wouldn't be enough space. Your scroll buttons would all overheat.)
As you might imagine, it's now hot! Finally, puts an end to that ridiculously cold Winter we all experienced down here. Most days it's around 20 degrees now, moving up to 26 if you're lucky. And no clouds, which really makes a difference in terms of open sunlight area coverage. I could pretend that I am sharing this with you just to open the discours with pleasentries about the weather - but really it's just to rub it in. I know the vast amount of my (expansive) readership is UK based, and therefore knocking about in much less exotic temperatures. I HAVE SUNBURN EVERYWHERE. And I love it.
Just a couple of photos to show you what I mean. [Disclaimer: Other lagers are available]
Where to start? I have just made an appointment at the Dentist's for tomorrow, because I've chipped a tooth. Well, more the plastic cap I have on a tooth that got smashed out when I was skiing about five years ago (don't have a hyper-link for an image here, but I'm sure you don't mind). Either way, it is the fault of a baguette, which I ate and it was mega hard. Chipped me right up. I don't really ever eat baguettes, I always find them too crustacious, but sometimes, when displayed in the right manner, we just can't help ourselves. This particular one was in a shop with a nice presentation and decent lettuce leaves and above all only 2 euros (cheap for Toulouse)! You couldn't have sold it better to me if you'd sat it on the floor next to a really cute dog.
So I'm walking along the river towards the Prairie des Filtres where I planned on going to a PicNic, organised on Facebook, with a load of friends. In standard BYOB style, I decided to eat privately before going, then scrounge some free pasta when I got there. Obviously that day Karma (or God, if you're that way delud - I mean inclined) decided to have her way with me, and it befell me that I chipped my tooth. Kazzam.
SO I decide to go to a Dentist. Now, those of you that have read my previous posts will know that I am not the biggest fan of French administration. My opinion has not waivered. Here's another immaculately accurate transcript of what happened.
Ring Ring, Ring Ring
Me: Hello, I'd like to make an appointment please.
R: Certainly sir, when would you like to make it for?
M: Today, if you've anything going.
R: Umm, I'm sorry sir, but today is full.
M: Oh. Tomorrow?
R: Well my computer is saying it's full tomorrow, but how about Wednesday? It's not an emergency is it?
M: Tomorrow is Wednesday.
R: Oh yes, so it is! Well ok, sorry - you might have guessed I'm new at this job! Tomorrow there's a free slot at 13h30, if that suits.
M: Yes perfectly, thank you. And no, it's not an emergency. Will it be necessary to bring National Insurance details? I'm sorry, I'm foreign.
R: Oh no sir, we don't deal with any Social Security for our clients.
M: Oh..ok. (Whaat? No refund?! Oh well I can always bolt it after they've told me how much it would cost...)
R: I'd just like to take a few details if that's ok sir?
M: Certainly, go ahead
R: The problem?
M: Chipped tooth.
R: The cause?
R: Baguette? Oh, erm, I see.
R: What breed is the animal sir?
M: Pardon me?
R: What type?
M: I'm sorry, did you say animal?
R: Yes sir, your dog. What breed is it?
M: I haven't got a dog. The appointment is for me!
R: Oh, I'm terribly sorry sir, we don't do people here. This is a Vetinary Dogs' Clinic. We only perform medical and dental proceedures on canines.
At which point I hung up. Too embaressed to even reply.
So, it turns out I can now add the Pages Jaunes to my long list of hated French-administation-thingies. Why didn't they give more information?! At least put a picture of a dog or something on there. Or do they charge extra for that? They probably do, in fairness.
I was finally able to contact a real dentist, and get an appointment sorted for tomorrow.
I will post then (or was it Wednesday?..) with the results. I'll probably come back wearing a muzzle.